What Dreams May Come
by schillil
Summary: Raiders attack New Hope and Dom is at death's door. Updated and complete! Kel Dom
1. Decisions in the Dark

What Dreams May Come

Chapter 1: Decisions in the Dark

Okay gang, I don't own any of it. The characters belong to Ms. Pierce the lyrics to John Denver and his descendants.

I would really recomend reading Comunication Lines before continuing on to the third story in this series.

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It was dark, so very dark and silent. I couldn't hear anything. The silence roared in my ears. I coulden't even hear my heart beating. I couldn't see anything in the inky blackness; no sky, no ground, nothing. I was alone, so very alone. I should have been afraid, or sad, or maybe angry, but oddly there was only peace and silence.

I tried to remember what happened. Lord Myles had sent word that the Scanrans had gotten a new "toy"; a strange device that exploded in a shower of fire and metal fragments. No one knew what actually set it off, but many had seen the effects. They were horrible.

Three squads had been sent to New Hope to help Kel and the refugees with spring planting and more importantly spring raids. We'd been there a week when the raiders attacked. They were everywhere, but ever since the fall of Maggot they were disorganized. They didn't fight together. But as Raoul says, a fool can kill you just as dead and are less predictable.

I remember the chaos, the screams of men, women, and horses caught in the fray. Then one of the bastards I could have sworn was dead rose up out of the mud like a wraith, my halberd driven through his gut. He staggered forward sword hanging loosly in his hand. He reached for something on his belt then stopped. He changed course aiming for Kel's blood spattered back. I strugled forward. As he swung for Kel, my sword sang. I cleaved his head from his shoulders. Then the world went mad. An explosion threw me in the air. Kel cried something in Yamani, then all went black.

I started thinking about Kel; the pain in her face, Gods, how I would have liked to wipe it from my memory. She was my friend above all else. Might we have become something more? With a shock I realized how much I would have liked a chance to find out. I had always admired her strength, her loyalty, and her persistence. She proved to them all that she was as good as any boy, maybe even better. I-I loved her for it. With a jolt, I realized that what I felt for her was much more than mere friendship. But with one sweep of my sword, I had lost all chance to tell her. I hoped she forgave me.

Gradually, I realized that I was no longer alone. A solitary figure stood a little apart, as if waiting for me to notice him. His dark cloak flapped in an unfelt breeze. His dark hair looked a bit like Neal's when he had been running his hands through it. He looked at me through bottomless black eyes. I bowed solemnly to him.

"Well, mortal. What have you to say for yourself?" His voice sounded hollow and maybe just a bit weary. I wondered if Gods got tired. His gaze bored into me and I was reminded that when a god asks a question it is considered wise to answer.

"I don't know what to say, my lord. I don't think I'm ready to die, but I don't get a choice, do I?"

He chuckled softly. "Do you care so much for that life, Domitan of Masbolle: the pain, the fear, and the killing?"

"It's not all fear and pain, my lord. There is joy, laughter, and friendship." I grinned, stopped for a moment, then looked into his eyes. "There is love," I whispered.

"Love? Yet you chose to kill for a living." He was not accusing, merely stating fact.

"No, my lord, I chose to guard and help people. I kill because I must to protect those in my charge, those I care for."

The god smiled slightly and extended his hand. I placed my hand in his. He led me through the shadows. I saw fleeting glimpses of people I knew, images from my past. I beheld Kel slouched in a chair, her eyes haunted by demons I could not slay. A thick bandage covered her forehead. I felt helpless and looked away.

"My lord? Every story I've ever heard says I should be seeing a light in the distance. We are approaching the Peaceful Realms, aren't we?"

He laughed. "Are living mortals so in tune with the dead then?"

I thought of this and grinned ruefully. I was gradually becoming aware of heaviness. Every step came slower, every breath harder to draw. A dull ache built in my skull and my leg started throbbing. Every fiber of my being protested. I had always been lead to believe that pain should be gone in the Black God's realm. I chose to say nothing to my guide though.

Finally we stopped. I looked into the god's bottomless eyes and somehow knew that I must take the final steps alone. I wanted to say something, to protest. I wanted to live! I had too much to do. He nodded me onward, all the same. My thoughts grew hazy. I took one step, then another. I looked back once then stepped out into the oblivion.

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Awareness crept over me softly. I heard footsteps and murmurs near me. Nothing made sense. I tried to open my eyes, but found the effort was costly. The ache in my brain swelled. .Whatever I lay on was soft. I figured it must be a bed. The footsteps approached.

"Gods, Dom, come on! Wake up! I know you're in there. You can't just die on me. You're supposed to be my best man." Blast! I recognized the Meathead's voice. Was he dead too or was this just another weird joke played by the Black God? I struggled to open my eyes, but I had no control over my body. I was forced to listen, a captive audience inside my own mind.

''Come Nealan, you're only upsetting yourself. There is nothing more that we can do. Yelling at him will not make him wake faster and it will only serve to distress the other patients further." That must have been Lady Yukimi.. Her Common was excelent, but still somewhat stilted.

I heard my cousin leave the room, but someone remained behind. It wasn't that I heard them. The person made almost no noise, silent as a cat. I could just sense that I wasn't alone and it was a comfort. The person drew near the bed.

"It wasn't supposed to happen this way, you idiot," they sighed. "You were not supposed to try to get yourself killed." The voice was so low; I couldn't tell whom it belonged to. "How many times do I need to tell you I can take care of myself? We need you here, in one piece. I need-" The words stopped with a sigh. Something told me that it was a woman sitting at my bedside. I tried again to open my eyes, to move at all, but no, I was still unable.

A door creaked softly and I heard light steps enter the room.

"Sir Neal says you gotta rest. He says that you can't heal if you won't lie down. I'm not gonna ask if you got any sleep; I know better. Did you eat today?"

"I'm staying here, Tobe. Dom saved my life; I won't leave him alone in the darkness. I want to be here in case he," she faltered. "Just in case, Tobe."

Tobe sighed, "I'll go get you something to eat." He sounded more like an old man than a young boy, an old man who had seen too much in too few years. A lot of the youngsters in New Hope spoke that way. It was sad, really. I wanted to shake my head, but couldn't even manage that. I was beginning to get annoyed.

"Dom, I don't know if you can hear me, but I hope you can. There are so many things I want to say, but I don't know how to say them. I-we need you." She gave a little humorless laugh. "Who am I kidding? You probably can't hear me. The truth is I-I need you. You don't let me take myself too seriously." Her voice was so familiar, but too raspy and quiet to place.

"Any change?" I was so focused on puzzeling out who the woman was that I hadn't heard Neal come back.

"No."

"You know we played together when we were children, before I left for University and everything. We were always running around beating each other with wooden swords. He took great pleasure in leaving me with bruises in very uncomfortable places before lessons or nice dinners with my mother. She wouldn't find out about it until later, usually. Mother was afraid we would kill each other. He wa all brawn though, I was the smart one."

"How many times did he trick you into doing something stupid?"

"Nev- all right, a couple of times." Liar, I wanted to laugh. I caught you more times than you can count. "The Stump never told us about all of this: the clean up, the wounded, the dead, the stormwings." The woman sobbed and I heard sudden movement and knew that Neal was comforting her. I had always known that the Meathead wasn't all cynicism. I licked my lips, wished I could open my eyes, then realized what I had done. _I _had licked my lips. I tried to move my hand and felt it twitch, but opening my eyes was still beyond my reach. I would have groaned in frustration, but my throat was so dry that nothing came out.

"Come on. Would you please go lie down? You are going to make yourself worse. It isn't like you have far to go. You can see him in the morning."

"No, Neal. I'm not going yet. He needs me. You are the one in charge. You said it yourself. I'm on the wounded list. Don't worry," she sighed. "I won't do anything stupid. Go on, Yuki needs your help with the other wounded."

I heard the door click shut. I struggled to turn my head. It felt like I had slept for a thousand years, but I managed it. I had to look; I had to know who this woman was. She took my hand and I felt hot tears splash against my skin. As slowly as mountains wash out to sea, I dragged my eyelids opened and focused on-

"Tears?" I croaked. "For me, Kel?"

"Dom?"

It took everything I had to reach up and take hold of her shoulders. I drew her toward me. She buried her face in my shirt and sobbed to make up for all the times she hadn't. I smoothed her short silky hair with one trembling hand.

"I'm all right, Kel. Everything is going to be all right."

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_Lady, are you crying, do the tears belong to me?  
Did you think our time together was all gone?  
Lady, you've been dreaming, I'm as close as I can be  
And I swear to you our time has just begun._

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A/N: Thanks to all of the wonderful reviewers of this story in its original form, My Sweet Lady. Gretta99, pianoscene, and Madame-S-Butterfly, you guys are wonderful.

This is an updated version. I'm fixing a few parts so that when the time comes for the sequal to start it will make sense.

For anyone who recognizes the song, it is My Sweet Lady, by John Denver.


	2. It's Not Your Fault

Disclaimer: Right guys, you know the drill. I don't own any thing of value. 'Nough said?

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Chapter Two: It's Not Your Fault

I don't know how long we stayed that way, certainly long enough that my shirt was damp. If I held her a bit longer, well, I wasn't complaining. Eventually Kel sat up and gave me a weak smile. She rubbed a bandaged hand over her face. I was suddenly struck by how dreadful she looked. In addition to the bandage on her right hand, her left arm was splinted and hung in a makeshift sling, a green tinged bruise peeked out above her collar and her head was bandaged. I'm sure there were other injuries out of sight. Despite all of that, I thought she was the most wonderful sight I had ever seen.

"Gods, Dom, I'm sorry," she muttered, looking away.

"For what?" I rasped. My mind, still somewhat muddled from the pain, could not fathom what she had to apologize for.

"For what?" The look I got was one you would give a child or a simpleton. "Goddess, Dom, where should I begin? For you getting hurt? Or perhaps for blubbering all over you like a-a girl mere seconds after you woke up?" A slight blush crept over her. "Or what about when I threatened you? That might do it." The last part was barely above a whisper.

I had never seen her this flustered and frankly, it made me nervous. "First of all, it wasn't your fault that I got hurt. I thought I had killed the bastard when I ran him through with my halberd. The fact that I didn't meant that I had to stop him from getting you from behind." I couldn't raise my voice above a whisper, but I methodically ticked off on my fingers answers to her questions.

"Second, I'm guessing you thought I would die. How could I blame you for that? I thought I was dead." She opened her mouth to protest, but I hurried on. "Mithros, Kel you've been around the Own long enough. You aren't some green recruit, you've seen the kracken. Moreover, you've seen men after the battle. Some men grab the nearest willing wench and run off into the bushes." That got a watery laugh.

"Some throw up, some want to be alone, and some weep. Come to think of it, a lot of the men feel like sobbing after battles, especially if they've been wounded _and_ come close to losing friends." .She nodded hesitantly, but would not fully meet my gaze. "So now, what is this about threatening me?"

"Ah, that, well," She stopped short.

I arched one brow. She shook her head. "Forget I mentioned it." She yawned.

"If you keep that up, your head will split in half," I joked.

"So the dreamer awakes."

I looked toward the door. Neal looked terrible: disheveled and exhausted. He leaned on the doorjamb with his arms crossed like usual, but for once I wasn't sure but that the frame wasn't the only thing keeping him upright. He stumbled in and sank on the edge of an empty cot nearby.

"Still blaming herself, eh?" He looked at me strangely. I nodded.

"Would she be Mother if she weren't?" I grinned.

"I'm right here," Kel grumbled then yawned again.

Neal looked at her with concern. "Kel, he's awake now. Please lie down and get some rest."

"No, Neal. We have matters to discuss." She argued between yawns that she was attempting to smother.

I could see she was fighting off exhaustion. _Yes,_ I thought,_ Lady Knight, we certainly do, but not right now._

"No, you don't. You are going to bed if I have to spell you to do it. I must have been crazy to let you stay up this long. You can talk when you're both rested."

I glanced at my cousin. When did he start sounding like his father? He was glaring at Kel, willing her to go and collapse.

"Go on Kel. Get some rest. I'll still be here in the morning, I promise" She stood up, took two steps and dropped. For a moment time stopped. Neal lunged forward and caught her before she hit the floor. I just lay there; my heart pounding. He checked her over.

"We were afraid this might happen." He heaved her onto the cot and sat in the chair she had been occupying. "She wouldn't leave your side, you know. Not since the moment she woke up." He gave me an odd look. Several times he opened his mouth as if to say something then closed it again.

"You'd give a fish a run for his money, Neal," I croaked.

"You must be alive. You're making jokes," he grumbled, though I could see laughter in his eyes. Yes and maybe relief too.

Finally he continued, "She said she wouldn't leave you alone in the dark. Does she know about...?"

He was referring to my discomfort of being totally alone. I shook my head. Neal alone knew about my fear and for all of his idiotic moments I knew he would never tell a soul.

"Will she be all right?" I whisper. He looked up at me, his dark brow furrowed.

"She just needs rest, as do you. You've been out for a week. Kel woke up about three days ago, but hasn't really slept since then. Yuki moved the cot in here so that she might get _some_ rest." I could see the questions in his eyes, questions that I couldn't answer.

Yuki slipped in with spare blankets and covered Kel. "I am glad you are awake, Sergeant. I have known Keladry for many years. I have never seen her that distraught. It is not our way," she said quietly. She too gazed at me, her face calm and smooth, but her eyes full of questions.

"You know they called her the Yamani Lump, Joren and his crowd? She was always so calm, while I ran my mouth," Neal smiled down at his friend then looked at me again.

"Dom, do you know why she..." He stopped when Yuki touched his arm. He glanced at her and she frowned slightly. My cousin shook his head, got up and walked out of the room.

"Lady Yukimi, what happened? I don't remember much."

She sat in the chair. "We do not know, Domitan. We think the man was carrying the new weapon. When you killed him he dropped it and it exploded. We think it was connected to his life force somehow. You were thrown back and hit your head on a tree. The device threw shards of metal everywhere. A small piece hit Kel in the forehead. You took a large wound to the leg." I fought off momentary panic as I looked toward my legs. "Do not worry, Neal and I saved it. If Kel had not pulled you inside and gotten you to us, you might have lost it. We did our best, but you will likely have a limp."

"If that is the worst of it, I'm lucky." I could have lost Kel, I realized. I might have lived and she might have died from the blast. A cold shiver trickled down my spine as I looked at her.

"My Lady," I started, but she raised her hand..

"Please, Domitan, we will be family soon. Please call me Yuki.."

"Yuki, then," I bowed my head in acknowledgement. "And I'm Dom to my friends and family. I know that you and Neal have questions." I glanced a Kel. She looked so peaceful.

Yuki smiled softly. "I would, perhaps, not have been so blunt."

"Yes, but I'm a Tortallan barbarian. I can be blunt and get away with it."

"Then I will be as well. She has been my friend for many years. I do not wish to see her hurt. Do you care for her?"

I looked at the woman before me and knew some of what had attracted my cousin's attention. I looked back at Kel's sleeping form. Just seeing her there was enough to cause my chest to tighten. I took a deep breath.

"Yuki, I don't...I can't..." I stopped, feeling helpless. How could I tell her what I was feeling when I hadn't even told Kel.

"Dom, you do not need to say more. I understand. I will tell no one."

"Thank you," I whispered. I cleared my throat, "I glad to have friends like you and Neal. I owe you my life and my career."

"No doubt, and just think of the lovely scars you'll have to show off for the ladies at court. You know they like veterans who have saved their delicate selves from danger." Neal walked in with some of his old swagger. He hid something behind his back.

Yuki swatted her betrothed with her shukusen, making him grunt.

"Careful, dearest, or I shall drop the flagon with my favorite cousin's medicine in it."

Neal had returned bearing the vilest substance I had ever smelled in a cup bearing a dragon emblem. I glanced at him warily.

"Drink up, cousin. It will help you heal." He smirked.

I looked into the oily black liquid, then closed my eyes and swallowed. Great merciful Mother! It was like bitter liquid fire blazing down my throat. I coughed, certain that smoke would escape. I glared at the Meathead.

"If I didn't know any better," I wheezed, "I'd say you did that on purpose!"

"Who me? And risk the wrath of our dear Protector? Not likely. I have more sense than that." His impish snicker belied that though.

"Her wrath," I scoffed. The potion worked quickly. I was beginning to feel hazy.

"Yes, Dom, her wrath." I was vaguely aware of Yuki drawing up the blankets and then both stealing away.

The last thing I saw before Gainel wrapped me in his cloak of dreams was Kel.

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Okay! So what do you think? When I went back and read though it I realized that I had shorted one of my favorite character's. So I added the whole Yuki/Dom conversation. (No, they will never be a pair in my stories. I happen to like the cannon pairings.)

I really like old movies. Go watch The Court Jester sometime. It is worth it. very punny, oops I mean funny. Hint: The pellet with the poison is in the flagon with the dragon.

By the way, have you read the first story in the series yet? It's called Communication Lines. While it isn't needed for this story, it will be to understand the next one.

Ja ne, minna-san.


	3. The Trouble with Answers

Disclaimer: Still do not own Ms. Pierce's characters. Bummer!

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Chapter Three: The Trouble with Answers

My dreams were fretful to say the least. Voices of the dead and dying swirled in a horrific symphony around me. Then I opened my eyes.

I was viewing the attack from the outside, a bystander in my own memory. I watched myself run the Scanran with the device through with my halberd. The blow should have killed him, but it only knocked him down. Unbelievably, he staggered to his feet, my weapon still in his gut. A look of pure malice in his eyes, he looked at the other me and reached for something on his belt, stumbled, then turned on Kel. The hatred there mirrored my own.

I stood transfixed as the other me swung his blade, neatly slicing his head from his shoulders. Even before the spray of blood could start, the small gray egg tied to his belt errupted in a fury of fire and metal fragments. I roared as a shard knocked Kel from her saddle. I watched my other self get hurled like a child's toy into a nearby tree.

I caught the start of something Kel yelled in Yamani.

"Dom, wake up, for goodness sake. It's just a dream," someone whispered fiercely. The images burst like a bubble as I opened my eyes. Grey predawn light filtered in through a crack in the shutters. I felt a hand on my arm and turned my head.

"Kel?" She crouched near my bed squinting in the dimness. I gazed around the room and took in the disaster. Pillows and blankets were strewn everywhere. Kel's cot was overturned and the chair lay on its side. "What happened?"

She chuckled softly, sending shivers up my spine. "You happened, Sergeant Domitan. I woke up when you threw a pillow at me. I threw one back, then realized that you were having a nightmare."

"I did all of that?" I stared.

"Well, no. I kind of capsized the cot when I tried to untangle myself from the blankets. You were yelling so loud I thought you might wake the entire village."

The door banged open. Neal stood there wild-eyed in his nightshirt bearing a poker and a bedpan, Raoul close behind him with his sword. They surveyed the disaster blankly.

"Do I want to know what you two were doing?" Neal drawled.

I was caught between embarrassed silence and anger. Yuki and Buri slipped into the room while I sputtered.

"It was a dream," giggled Kel.

"Some dream," drawled Buri.

"That was no dream," I muttered fiercely. "It was a nightmare," I licked my lips. " I don't usually get them." I glared at my cousin.

Buri looked around the room in astonishment. "You did this in your sleep?"

"Actually, the cot was my fault." Kel murmured.

"Still, you say you don't normally have nightmares?" I shook my head. "Not even after a battle?"

"No, at least never like that, never so vivid."

"Neal, did you give them anything last night?"

"What? Besides a hard time you mean?" I shot him a look. "Kel was already out, but I gave Dom something I'd cooked up to help speed the healing."

"Nealan, what was in that potion?" Yuki sent a sharp look toward her betrothed.

"Oh, just the healing potion Alanna taught me. I added some tincture of dreamflower to help him sleep, though. Why?"

She raised one delicate brow at her betrothed. "Refresh my memory, Neal. Alanna's healing potion has athelas in it, correct? And what happens when you mix tincture of dreamflower with athelas?"

The look on Neal's face was comical. The realization that he had done something monumentally stupid appeared in his eyes. He had the good grace to blush. "Eh, well. It seems to have healed him though." He muttered. Yuki swatted him with her shukusen.

"Neal, what do they do when mixed?" Kel queried. I looked at her. She had a wicked glint in her hazel eyes. I think she was enjoying my cousin's discomfiture as much as I was.

"It causes very powerful dreams. We sometimes use it with the Riders when they've been hurt but need to remember details of a battle. Unfortunately, it can be somewhat hazardous, as we can all see." She gestured toward the war zone.

"The person who takes it is usually restrained and we always make sure that the person has a trusted person nearby to avoid a situation where they could hurt themselves or someone else." Buri bent to pick up the shredded remains of a pillow.

I sat there dumbstruck for a moment. In my delirium, I might have seriously hurt Kel. I caught her looking at me out of the corner of her eye. She gave a barely perceptible shake of her head along with a look that clearly said, "don't worry about it, blame _him_."

"So, Dom, do you remember anything fresh about the battle, then?" Kel asked brightly.

"Actually, yes. At least a little bit. I saw the explosion device, or at least the outside of it."

"Really?" chorused the entire room.

"It doesn't look like much really, just a little gray egg, about the size of my fist." I closed my eyes to visualize it better. "It was dark grey metal, scored in little shapes, with a hole. There was a thong threaded through it which he used to hang from his belt. I think it has blaze balm inside." A few nodded, but I shook my head.

"I don't know what sets it off though."

"What about all of the flying bits of metal?"

"I think it might be from the device itself. Dom said it was scored. It probably wouldn't take much balm to touch it off." Neal muttered.

"But what about the fire? We've all seen flames from those things. What sets it off ?" Raoul asked.

"My," Kel checked herself. "I mean Raoul, what if it was magic?"

"Of course! Why didn't I think of that?" He glared at Buri, "Don't answer that. Too distracted with everything else that's going on, I'd bet. I'd better go send a message to Numair and Daine." Raoul shook his head. "Neal, don't forget that Wyldon is coming today. He will expect full reports on the battle, the progress here, and how the wounded fare."

Neal glowered at the older knight. "Of course, my Lord Wyldon wants reports. All he ever wants is reports. Written in triplicate, too, no doubt," grumbled Neal. " Tell me how I am supposed to oversee the village, tend my patients and write reports? Gah!"

"Neal, it's the price of command," Raoul sighed. "All of us have to write reports, even the king. Write the first copy then fob the rest off on one of the clerks."

"Can't. We were down to just two before the fight and now both are wounded. Neither will be writing anything for a few more days." Neal ran his fingers through his already mussed hair. "Gods all curse the person who invented written reports!" Kel bit her lip, visibly fending off an attack of the giggles.

"Well, if the Stump wants reports, I'd best hie me off to write them. They certainly won't write themselves." Neal stalked out.

"Sumimasen, but I must go, as well, and check on the other patients. Explain what all the noise was about this morning. Sayonara." Yuki bowed politely and left.

Raoul and Buri settled gingerly on the cot while Kel perched on the edge of my bed. I really wanted to talk to her alone, to finish our conversation. There was so much to discuss, but it all had to wait.

"You gave us quite a scare, Dom." Buri alleged. She reached over and laced her fingers with my lord's.

"Well, my lady, I try. But if I were you, I would blame the Meathead."

"I don't think she was referring to this morning, Dom," murmured Kel. I looked at her. The bandage around her forehead had slipped off displaying a thin scar that stretched from the bridge of her nose toward the outer edge of her right eye.

She looked at Raoul, "When do you suppose we can finally get up and get back to work?"

"In a hurry to get out of this room, are we?" Raoul smirked. Kel looked at the blankets. Raoul reached out and patted her on the knee. "I'm just teasing, Kel. Neal hinted last night at dinner that you should be able to be up and about tomorrow. If you don't relapse and if you don't fight off the healing."

"With Neal in charge? We have to fight off the healing if we value our lives," I joked.

"Wait until your mother sees that scar, Kel. She will know you fought the healers, then she'll whack you with her fan," Raoul grinned. Kel ran her fingers over the scar.

"Well, I guess I'll never pass for a court beauty now. Maybe I should try like Owen to use the scar to attract some little airbrained court fluff for my string," She contemplated. "No, that would never work. I'd kill him in a heartbeat just to put _me_ out of _my_ misery." She looked at me suddenly with a pout that would do some of those court beauties justice. "Oh Sergeant, how shall I ever find me a husband with this dreadful scar? It's so unfeminine." She batted her eyes at me. I was hard pressed to keep from laughing. "I shall wear a mask all of my days." Her lower lip quivered, but her eyes crinkled at the corners in Yamani laughter. I gave up and laughed at her act.

"Ah me, child. If you can keep your sense of humor when Wyldon is through with you, you'll be fine," laughed Buri, wiping tears from her eyes. "Or perhaps it will only serve to prove that you are as mad as the rest of us,"

"On that note, I think we shall leave you two to rest. Oh, and you are to stay here in your _own_ beds for the remainder of the day. Healer's orders," Raoul smirked. Kel and I shared a look. I was not prepared for matchmaking attempts from my dear cousin and his betrothed. The expression on Kel's face showed the same alarm.

"Don't look so worried, you two. They really don't want you up and about yet, but as the commanding officers in the attack, Wyldon will want a report from each of you. It will be easier if you are in the same place." Buri explained. Then the look on her face became one of sheer mischief. " And if you are still abed with your wounds, he can't make you go back to work. Maybe you'll get whatever is going on between you out of your systems." I gaped at the former Rider Commander as she and my lord left and pointedly shut the door.

"Well, I guess we have our 'orders'." Kel laughed. She stood up. "I hope staying in bed does not preclude a trip to the privy. I'll be right back," She left quickly.

On my own, with the sounds of the infirmary surrounding me and the sounds of the village waking drifting in through the window, I thought about what Buri had said. Were my feelings really that obvious? Kel never seemed to notice, but then, Kel seemed blissfully unaware of a lot of things when she chose to ignore them.

"What are you smiling about?" Kel entered the room.

"Just thinking."

"Well, don't hurt yourself, Sergeant. I wouldn't want you to strain your brain, what with all your other injuries." She smirked. I threw my remaining pillow at her.

"Kel."

"Dom."

We both stopped short. After an awkward moment, I mumbled, "Go ahead."

"Dom, I just wanted to say thank you for saving my life. I don't deserve a friend like you."

I gaped at her. "What are you talking about? Of course you do. I think that blow to your head did something to your thinking."

She looked down. I was immediately contrite. "Look, Kel, I'm sorry. I didn't mean that. I guess I'm still a little on edge from that dream." She met my gaze and smiled a bit. I was struck, once again by how pretty she was.

"Say, Kel? In my dream I heard you say something. It was Yamani. What did it mean?"

She looked away, toward the window. "I don't remember yelling anything."

"Did I say you yelled it?" I asked with a grin. "I think you do remember. And, Lady Knight, you have yet to explain that comment from yesterday."

She looked at me warily. "What comment?"

"You said you threatened me. I don't remember you ever threatening me. At least, not recently."

"Ah, well," she bit her lip. "Perhaps if you told me what you heard in your dream?" She wouldn't meet my gaze.

"I don't speak Yamani, Kel, you know that. But it sounded like 'shine ba something, something ha.' Then I woke up. Its not much to go off of but," I faltered. Kel had buried her head in her hands. "Kel? What is it? Did I say something wrong?"

"No Dom," she sighed. "I did. I didn't think you'd remember that. I won't repeat the line. It doesn't translate well anyway." She still wouldn't look at me and somehow that hurt more than all my injuries. I slipped out of bed and sat next to her on the cot.

"Kel, look at me, please? What does it mean?"

"You'll laugh."

"No, I won't. I promise, on my honor as a Masbolle. Please tell me."

"It roughly means, 'If you die, I will never forgive you.'"

I sat there for a moment, numb. That was the trouble with answers. They often lead to more questions. I placed a finger under her chin and lifted it so I could look in her eyes.

"There isn't anything to laugh at, Kel." For a moment, I thought about kissing her. Then my rational side inserted itself and brought me back to reality. It was not the time for shenanigans. Instead I smiled at her, "It worked, though."

"What?"

"I took your advice, even if I didn't know what you said. I stuck around, didn't die. So your threat worked." She shoved me off the cot. I grinned up at her from the floor.

The door opened and we both turned. Owen stood there with his arm in a sling. "Although I'm sure you are both having a jolly time in here, the rest of us are still trying to sleep. Can you keep it down to a dull roar?" He gave me a look that would peel paint then left the room.

Kel and I were hard put to smother the laughter.

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A/Ns: Thank you to all my wonderful reviewers. I won't make threats like "I will only update when I have X reviews." For one thing, I can't predict when a section will get done. Moreover, threatening me with throwing rotten veggies if I don't update soon will not make it go faster either. lol.

I'd like to thank JRR Tolkien's LOTR for the healing plant athelas. Yes, I took a couple of liberties with it.


	4. Horse Sense

Chapter 4: Horse Sense

Disclaimer: Nope, don't own any of this.

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A short time later, Yuki stuck her head in the room.

"Keladry," she said, "I want to do one last healing on your arm before Lord Wyldon arrives. I know it makes you tired so, if you wish, I might be able to arrange a soak in the furo afterward."

Kel's eyes widened with appreciation. "That sounds wonderful."

"Furo?" I asked, confused by the unknown term. She smiled at me.

"Furo, oh barbaric one, is a Yamani term that means a soaking tub. You wash first with cold water then soak all your cares away in hot water."

She stood up stiffly and touched my shoulder, lingered for a moment, then mimed a blow at my ear. I ducked it with a snicker and gently shoved her toward the door. Yuki smiled at our childish exchange. After Kel passed her she sent me a questioning look. I shook my head and shrugged. I knew how I felt, but I decided to wait and see how Kel felt before making blatant overtures. Yuki nodded.

The thought that she might think of me as no more than a friend sobered me. I had never been in a position like this. Usually my mother or one of her friends at court was throwing ladies at me as fast as they could. The barage often left me exhausted. Neal sometimes teased that I enjoyed breaking hearts, but I didn't. Maybe that was why I liked beinng out in the field so much. There I was useful as more than a "good match."

I looked around the room. The remains of the pillow I had destroyed lay scattered about. I decided to pick up all the bits, maybe sew them all back together like an odd patchwork, anything to avoid thinking about useless what ifs. So I gathered them together, every little bit of fluff, and placed them on my bed. The fabric was torn but in better condition than I had expected. I began to wonder where I could find a sewing kit when I heard a tapping at the door.

"Come in."

Tobe entered. "Sir Neal said he heard you moving around up here and sent this with his regards." The boy handed me a small cloth bundle. I untied it and started to laugh. What is it?" The boy queried.

"This, Tobe, is my dear cousin's way of subtly hinting that I need to fix the damage I did to this pillow." The child looked confused. "Haven't you ever seen a sewing kit, boy?"

He shook his head. I motioned for him to come over and showed him the pins, needles, tiny thread cutter and maybe a half dozen ells of thread. He reached out and touched the business end of a needle. He grunted and stuck the abused digit in his mouth.

"I never seen a bunch of nobles so bent on fixin' stuff the' selves as you lot," Tobe muttered around his stuck finger, watching me squint as I threaded the needle.

"And how many nobles have you met, youngster, besides us?" I asked. I stuck the needle through my sleeve and began sorting out the pieces like a child's puzzle.

"A few as came to th' inn were I worked before." He shrugged and picked up a piece of fabric and matched it to another. "Most of 'em, they just handed stuff they broke to a servant. If it could be replaced it was, if not, well, they couldn't mess up their hands fixin' it." He matched another piece.

"Well, Tobe," I said, fitting a piece of my own to the rest, "the men of the Own don't always have the luxury of a servant to mend our things. Anyhow, most people are busy. Whom do you think I should ask? You?"

"Eh, no, that's women's work." He scoffed. I looked at him, waiting for the realization of what he had said to sink in. It took a moment.

"Erm, don't tell Lady Kel I said that, Sergeant."

I chuckled. "Of course not. Would you like me to show you how? I'm not the best, but I can sew a straight seam. And besides, once you get the hang of it, it's kind of relaxing."

"I guess it couldn't hurt."

"Actually, it might if you stick your finger with that needle again." I showed him how to work the thimble, which was too small for my large fingers anyway. Soon he was sewing bits together on his own. If the stitches were a tad uneven and the seam a little sloppy, well, he had to learn somehow. Besides, I thought, who would see it beside me?

"So, what have you been up to while Kel and I have been laid up?"

"Besides my normal duties, I been takin' care of the mounts for you, Lady Kel, Sir Neal, and Sir Merric. Plus Lady Kel has me in lessons. She wants me to learn to read and do figures. Can't guess why. Don't need that to care for the horses or her things." He shook his head.

"I can tell you a few things that they are good for. If you are contracting for a horse or feed or leather for tack you have to be able to read and figure. If you are making tack you need figuring to measure the horse exactly. Reading and figuring are both very important for business. And as Kel will make sure you are well set up, maybe even with an apprenticship when you leave her service, you need to know all of that so that other nobles don't say she's done wrong for her servants."

"Huh. I guess I never thought about it that way."

We lapsed into silence for a few moments. The cloth was beginning to look like a pillow again, if a little misshapen.

"Sir?"

"Yes, Tobe?"

"Do you like Lady Kel?"

I was startled for a moment. "Yes, of course I like her. She is one of my best friends."

"I mean do you, I don't know, _like_ her?"

"I'm not sure what you're getting at," I hedged.

"Well, I was talking to Drake and he said that you talk to Hawk like Sir Nealan talks to him."

"Wait, are you saying that you've been gossiping with the Meathead's horse?" It was too much for me to take in

"Well, I been grooming all of your horses. Like I said, everyone else was either hurt or too busy," he muttered defensively.

"I thank you for that, but I think I want to know how Neal talks to Drake." I prayed for patience.

"I never heard Sir Neal say nothin', but Drake says Sir Neal tells 'im how much he likes Lady Yuki's hair, and her eyes, and how graceful she is. You know... stupid mushy stuff. Drake says that he thinks its silly to get so worked up over a two- legger mare, even if she does have a pretty mane. Drake likes her though. She brings him treats."

I sighed with relief. "Tobe, I have never said anything like that to Hawk."

The boy scratched his head. "No, I guess not. More like how you always tell him how brave and loyal and smart she is."

"Tobe," I laughed, "Everyone has heard me say that, including Kel. It's true, and I admire her for it."

He glanced at me sidelong, "And how pretty her eyes are? Or how funny she can be when she tricks Sir Neal?"

I looked at him darkly. Trust Neal's horse to gossip about that to the only horse mage in the area.

"Don't worry, I won't tell if ya don't want me too. Either way, if ya like her that's easier for me."

"How so?" I asked.

" 'Cause I gotta watch her all the time. But if you was to help watch her, I wouldn't have to worry she was about to do somethin' stupid."

"Old soul, you are remarkable." I shook my head. "I'd rather you didn't tell her, or anyone for that matter."

"Wasn't goin' to. That's your business. Just don't hurt her more'n you have to."

I chuckled. "I don't plan to hurt her at all."

We sat there silently for a while longer. I had just finished tying off the final stitch when the door opened. Kel stood there looking at us.

"Hello, Tobe. What are you doing here?" She queried.

"Helpin' Sergeant Domitan put the pillow back together."

She raised an eyebrow at him. "I thought you told Fanache sewing was women's work." I looked at the boy. He looked a little panicked. She laughed, "I'm guessing the Sergeant here set you straight?"

The boy nodded.

"Good, then I don't have to. Don't you have lessons soon?" He made a face but nodded. "Then you'd better get going." Tobe scurried out of the room.

"Let me see." Kel said. I handed her the pillow. Her eyes narrowed, "So which pieces did he sew and which ones did you?" She grinned.

"Hey! I taught him everything he knows, thank you very much." I shot back, taking pleasure from the good-natured banter.

Neal poked his head in the room.

"Kel, can you read this over before the Stump gets here?" He handed her a pile of paper.

"I will if I can decipher your handwriting."

"It's not that bad," he grumbled. He looked over at me. "I want to check the bandages on your leg. Then you might want to get cleaned up before Wyldon gets here."

I followed him out the door. Behind me I heard a groan as Kel began puzzling out my cousin's abysmal handwriting.

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A/N: Well gang one more chapter to go in this story. Then the fun will really begin. Don't forget to read Communication Lines.


	5. In Hot Water

Disclaimer: Not mine. Oh well, girl can dream can't she?

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Chapter Five: In Hot Water

We entered the treatment room of the infirmary and I sat in a chair and rolled up the leg of my breeches. I saw, for the first time, the damage to my leg. It looked like I had been run through a meat grinder then had a layer of new, shiny pink skin laid over. I shuddered a bit.

"It's not that bad, at least you can still walk and ride," Neal said over his shoulder as he hunted through a couple of drawers.

"I know. I was thinking how lucky I was. I could have lost it, and with it my career."

"Is your career so important to you, then?" Neal sat down on a small stool near my leg. I could feel the tingle of magic make my flesh itch.

"It's who I am, Neal. I don't know anything else." I watched with morbid fascination, as a second darker layer of skin seemed to creep across the first. It was a little disconcerting and I looked away.

"You don't know anything else but fighting? How sad," Neal murmured. He finished up and stood wearily. His face was ashen.

"Healing really takes it out of you, eh?"

He nodded and reached behind him for a pitcher and a mug.

"Skin is tricky. It doesn't always go where you want it too. That is what can lead to heavy scarring." He shook his head and downed the cup of what smelled like fruit juice.

"I suppose you want to get cleaned up?" He didn't wait for an answer, just turned and walked out of the room. I hurried to follow him. I noticed that I did limp a bit. The leg was a bit stiffer and weaker than it had been. I knew I'd have to work on that if I were ever going to fight again.

We passed though a door that I had barely taken notice of in the past. Inside was a large copper tub filled with steaming water.

"You wash over there with the buckets, and mind..."

"The water is cold," I interrupted. I enjoyed the look of shock on his face. "It's a Yamani furo, isn't it?" I continued mischievously.

"I won't ask how you know that. I'm certain that I don't want to know." He muttered. "Do you mind if I join you? I need to get cleaned up as well. Wyldon only accepts filth when you are fighting."

I shrugged and bent stiffly to strip off my breeches, loincloth and shirt. The water was cold, but somehow it felt quite refreshing. Finished, I sank gratefully into the tub. It stung a bit on the new skin, but the feeling of being clean and up to my neck in hot water more than made up for it.

Neal clambered in with a good deal of splashing.

"Cousin, you have the grace of an ox in a pottery shed." I teased.

"While you, Cousin, have some explaining to do."

"About?"

"Face it Dom, I know you better than that. If you are just playing with her, I'll, I'll, I don't know what I'll do. But remember it doesn't pay to annoy a healer. We know how you are put together and are best at taking you apart." His voice grew progressively louder.

"Whoa! Simmer down, Meathead! Who are we talking about?" I, of course, knew exactly whom he was talking about.

"My best friend, you idiot, Kel."

I nodded quietly. "I see. Well, I don't want to annoy the healer, so why don't you ask me questions like a civilized human, rather than a barbarian Scanran. I may not answer them, I may not know the answer. But unless you plan to broadcast this conversation to the whole village, I suggest you keep it down."

Neal swallowed audibly and brought himself in check. "Very well. What game are you playing?"

I opened my mouth to fire back a witty quip, but the words died on my tongue. What game indeed? "Neal, I'm not playing any games. Not this time, not anymore." I sighed. Never again, I thought to myself.

He looked nonplussed. "Not playing? Then just what are your intentions? Does she even know what you're up to?"

I shrugged helplessly. "I don't know. It's too new, Neal. I only just realized it when I was unconcious."

Neal sat there staring at me through the steam. "While you were unconcious?"

"I was trapped in a dream world between here and death, I think. I kept thinking about how much I would miss her, how sorry I was. I never wanted to hurt her."

"Stop!" Neal's gaze bored holes in mine. "Are you saying you are in love with my best friend?"

I looked down at the water, then back up. "I guess I am. I haven't thought about it much," I lied, "but yes."

Neal's eyes lit up. "This is fantastic! I can't wait to..."

"Don't you dare!" I snarled. He looked at me in astonishment. "Neal, if you breathe a word of this to anyone I will take great pleasure out of knocking you senseless. Then I will turn you over to Kel. If there is anything left of you I'll give it to Yuki with my blessing."

He blanched despite the heat of the bath. "You're serious?" he asked, eyes wide. "You care that much then?"

I nodded. "I haven't told her yet. I don't really know how she feels. I," I foundered, lost for what to say. I stumbled on uncertainly, "Neal, when I woke up, Kel was crying. I felt like someone had jabbed a knife in my heart. I was weak as a day old kitten, but when I held her, I don't know, suddenly it felt like everything was right with the world. I've never felt like that before."

Neal grinned knowingly. "Felt like your chest might explode? Or your heart might stop beating if you moved?"

I nodded, numbly. Leave it to Neal to be blunt.

"That's how I felt when Yuki handed me her shukusen after my Ordeal. If I were you, I'd tell her."

"Why should I tell Yuki?" I asked with a little of my old humor.

"Not Yuki, stupid, Kel. Between you, me, and the fence post, I think she cares for you as, shall we say, more than a friend? You couldn't see her when you were locked in Gainel's arms. She was distraught. She wouldn't sleep, could barely eat. We were afraid we might lose her. People can die from exhaustion, especially if they are wounded. I wasn't joking when I said that Yuki and I moved that cot in so that she would rest." He stood up and grabbed a towel.

I sat there for a moment more, digesting this new bit of information, then stood as well.

"Neal?"

He poked his head out of his shirt. "Yes?"

"Thanks," I said. "I promise, I'll tell her as soon as this business with Wyldon is finished. I owe her that much, at least."

He grinned, "That's all I can ask."

I made my way back to the room that I was currently sharing with Kel. Never before had I dreaded an encounter with a woman as much as this. Court fluffs that fawn all over you are a copper a dozen in Corus. Gods know how many my family had attempted to throw at me over the last few years. I was beginning to feel like Lord Raoul in a way, always hunted. Somehow, though, it was different with Kel. Granted she was no ravening beauty, but she was real in ways that the convent produced heiresses were not. Her looks were subtler, more like her small sparrows than a strutting peacock. But there it was. To me, she was beautiful, freckles, scars and all.

No, I thought with a self-depreciating snort, Neal was right. Kel deserved to know the truth. I set my hand to the latch when I heard voices inside. I eavesdropped shamelessly.

"I think you should tell him the truth, Keladry." I recognized Yuki's voice.

"I know, it's just that I wish..."

"If wishes were horses then beggars would ride. Even if you cannot, I can see the look in his eyes. He cares for you, possibly more than he thinks he ought." I suddenly felt very nervous. What if Kel had noticed how I looked at her, but was ignoring it? What if she didn't feel the same way? I suddenly felt as if I had ice in my veins. I heard footsteps approach and reached for the knob to open it, for all the world as if I had heard nothing.

Kel and Yuki looked at me. Kel's cheeks reddened slightly and Yuki just smiled softly. I backed up to allow Yuki to walk out. As she passed, she raised her delicate eyebrow and nodded toward Kel. Then we were alone together and as nervous as two adolescents at their first ball.

"So what did you and Yuki have to talk about?" I asked lightly. I wasn't sure that I wanted to know the answer.

She seemed to struggle with a response. "Nothing, really. That is, nothing you'd be interested in. Wedding plans mostly. Did you hear that Neal's mother wrote to him?"

I sat on my bed. "No, he didn't say anything. What does my aunt have to say?"

"She approves of the match, but will not come north for the wedding. She says that if Neal and Yuki want her blessing they will return to civilization for the ceremony."

"I can picture it. Have you met my aunt, the Duchess?" Kel shook her head. "She is as stubborn as the Meathead. She'll probably plan it to be the height of fashion and ... What?"

Kel's eyes danced. "She _is_ planning it. But Shinko is helping. They are going to make Neal wear a full men's kimono."

I started to laugh then stopped suddenly. "Kel? We are in the party. What are we going to be wearing?"

She grinned, "You'll see."

I shuddered, then joined her laughter. We sat in companionable silence for a few minutes. I was deep in thought. I had told Neal I would tell her after Wyldon's visit, but after hearing what she said to Yuki, I felt the inexplicable urge to tell her the truth and to know my own fate.

"Neal and I were talking in the furo."

"Oh? What about?"

I bit my lip nervously and looked away. "We were talking about you." I whispered.

"What was that?" She asked a bit breathlessly.

I gazed into her hazel eyes and nearly lost my nerve. I could hardly breathe. My mind froze up.

"Dom?"

I shook my head. "We were talking about you."

"Oh," she breathed. "I see. Well, the truth is, Yuki and I were talking about you some as well."

I nodded.

"Dom."

"Kel."

We laughed nervously. I gestured for her to continue.

"Dom, I have to ask you something."

"Go on," I fiddled with a repair in the quilt.

"Yuki says that she believes you care for me. Do you?"

"Of course I do! You are one of my best friends."

Kel's face fell. She looked away. "Friends," she murmured. My heart gave a lurch; she looked so sad, so disappointed. Someday, Domitan, you are going to attempt thinking before opening your mouth, I thought to myself furiously. I went over and perched on the edge of her cot.

"Kel," I said softly, "Kel, you _are_ one of my best friends. And I don't want to lose that." I gently turned her head. "But that isn't entirely the truth."

I felt numb and cold as her Yamani mask crept over her face. So calm and smooth, she had so rarely used it with me that I'd almost forgotten it existed, but there it was, shutting me out. Her eyes told a different story, though; they were desolate. "Dom, you don't have to say anything to make me feel better."

I wrestled a bit with my reply. "Yes, I think I do." I struggled to think of a way to make her understand. "You see, I promised my dear cousin that I would tell you the truth." I swallowed hard, "and that truth is that I think I've fallen in love."

"Do I know her?" Her voice was a little uneven and I could see the unshed tears welling up in her eyes.

"Yes, quite well, actually. Better than I do at least." I tried to bait her.

"I guess you had better tell her then." She looked away.

"I just did." She looked at me, shocked. I smiled a bit.

"You did? When?"

I laughed. "Kel, you goose, remind me to tell Yuki to look at your head again."

She gaped at me for a moment. I just watched her sort out the information, suddenly feeling shy and uncertain.

"Me?"

I nodded.

"You love me?"

I nodded again. The tears she'd held back spilled over and trickled down her cheeks. I mentally kicked myself. I wrapped my arms around her.

"Shhhh. Kel, please don't cry."

"You love me," she murmured into my shoulder. I nodded against her hair. She leaned back, meeting my eyes. I hardly noticed her reach up and brush a damp lock of hair out of my face. As if in a trance, we leaned together and kissed.

I had kissed other women before, but this was nothing like that. For the first time, my heart was involved and nothing I could think of could compare. In that instant I knew that I had found what I'd never known I was looking for. I tasted the salty sweetness of her tears and finally understood.

We were breathless when we broke apart. "I love you too," she whispered.

"Just remember who said it first," I grinned.

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A/N: Thanks to all the wonderful reviewers. This story is nearly wrapped up. Okay, did you all read Communication Lines? If not, shame on you. The next story won't make much sense without it. It shouldn't take long, I promise. Coming soon: The Journey.

BTW: I "borrowed" the last couple of lines from _The Cutting Edge_, which is one of my favorite movies.


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